Mirror bridge philsophy
THE MIRROR BRIDGE PHILOSOPHY
THE MIRROR
A wide range of life events can cause pain and distress, with many of these
events occurring outside of our control. The concept of the ‘mirror’ involves
personal analysis which aims to bring our life closer to where we desire it to
be. When we commit to personal growth, positive flow on effects can be
mirrored back to us when observing our own relationships. Increased
empathy, clearer thinking and improved decision making all start to emerge,
when we understand ourselves at a deeper level.
The MIRROR can start to challenge our existing thought patterns and also
reflect our behaviours and actions back to us in a new and meaningful way.
The MIRROR fogs up whilst our perception in troubled times is distorted. As
we learn to sit with emotional discomfort, we come to realise that the fog that clouds our mirror reflection only exists temporarily.
The MIRROR allows us to learn and be better role models to our children. As
we pay closer attention to our actions, we realise that we can learn so much
from our own family and loved ones.
The MIRROR is also ‘rearview’ in that we can look into the past to remind
ourselves of all we have faced and overcome. With gratitude, we can see more clearly who we are, and what it is we stand for.
The MIRROR can help us see the positive impacts we have had on others in
the past. If we look into the mirror with intent, we can see all of the progress
that we have made. A truthful mirror reflection gives us the opportunity to
build our own self worth and confidence.
The MIRROR is something that we may need to hold up at times for others.
When we show courage and hold a mirror up, we demonstrate compassion
and care for the people we love. It also allows our loved ones to feel they are
supported and we are along side of them in solidarity.
The MIRROR can be confronting when we realise that there is nobody else
there in the reflection, just ourselves. It becomes apparent that no-one or
nothing is coming to save us from our suffering. We start to see that real and purposeful change starts by holding our position in front of the mirror.
The MIRROR is something a parent can show to our children. To know that
they can be themselves and not be affected or influenced by the opinions,
reactions, and projections of others. Parents hold the mirror up to our kids so that we give them the genuine words of encouragement they so desperately crave.
THE BRIDGE
The bridge represents connection which is built upon understanding, empathy, and mutual respect between individuals. It requires open communication, active listening, a willingness to compromise, genuine words of encouragement, and appreciation for efforts. Bridges are built and maintained with our loved ones and families, where support and showing affection is most important in strengthening bonds with each other.
Emotional responses which accompany experiences of grief and loss, can
mean that remaining child focused when navigating a separation can be
extremely difficult. Children need to know that their emotional and practical
needs will be met. Parents can create stepping stones for their children so
that they have every opportunity to establish trust and confidence in the
separation decisions that are made jointly by both parents.
The BRIDGE can be durable, resilient, and have longevity. Love is essential for bridges to remain intact. Unless sufficient levels of trust and respect have been formed in a relationship, a bridge built solely on love will ultimately and inevitably collapse.
The BRIDGE of connection that an intimate partnership creates, will carry the weight of each person’s past emotional wounds. Ongoing individual work, as well as a shared commitment to grow and do the necessary hard work together as a team.
The BRIDGE can start shaking as it becomes unstable. Courageously getting off a bridge permanently or temporarily, can be the only option for many who are in intimate relationships. Staying on a bridge despite the instability, can often direct us towards what needs to be fixed and repaired once we pay attention to what we are being guided by.
The BRIDGE that exists in families, can be unique and different amongst adult siblings, parents, and other family members. Bridges only have a chance of being repaired when responsibility is taken, boundaries are honoured and respected, and apologies are made for harm that has been caused.
The BRIDGE is never too late for family members to commit to repair efforts through reconnection. Healing can also happen for individuals when a difficult and often painful realisation is made that a broken family relationship is irreparable.
The BRIDGE is a brand new formation process when it comes to building the foundation of a co-parenting partnership. With the primary goal of being child focused, exercising patience, self awareness, acceptance, and compromise should all be practiced and adopted to the
best of each person’s capacity and ability.
The BRIDGE post separation will never be perfect, and mistakes will be made. This means that persistence and self-compassion are so important, understanding that nothing in life is ever fixed and permanent. Circumstances change, people grow, and the developmental needs of children evolve as time passes. Bridge modifications are often necessary in the months and years after separation & divorce.
The BRIDGE is something we make a choice to step on. We decide to stand on bridges with people we love and care about. Stabilising a shaky bridge that a person is fearfully trying to walk across is about restoring hope, and helping the person feel empowered to make choices as they travel to the other side.
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